


your warm embrace. (Possibly discontinued)

by ToastFace



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Attempted suicide EVENTUALLY, I’ll go into more context of what’ll happen in notes., M/M, Oma is injured, One character may be depressed, Shuichi lives alone, angsty, because my weak heart cant take it, but not self inflicted, ill alert a million times in notes when that is coming up-, ill warn when that happens too, into season 53, like salt and vinegar chips with a drink of panta, pregame, pregame Oma - Freeform, pregame saihara, someone DOES commit murder eentually, this is an au where they aren’t accepted, with a side of fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-09
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-01-26 03:41:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21367600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToastFace/pseuds/ToastFace
Summary: Rejection was something Ouma knew very well. Ouma had been rejected by everything, everyone. His family despised him. His peers enjoyed his suffering. Even his online ‘friends’ pitied him. He couldn’t take rejection, not anymore. But perhaps someone could change that.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 54





	1. foggy morning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah! My first fanfic! I probably messed up with something, perhaps the grammar, the tags.. something.. but i’m super excited to have this up!! I worked really hard on it, and I think it paid off, of course this is just the first chapter, but still!

I didn’t want to get out of bed.

That probably sounds relatable, right? No one ever really wants to leave the warm, safe embrace of the covers. It was lightly raining outside, even though my shutters were closed I could see through the slim cracks, fog blanketing everything outside. Today was one of those days that would be perfect for you to do absolutely nothing, but fate is a cruel mistress with her own plans. Groaning, I slid out from my land of comfort and stood up, stretching slightly to help wake my brain.

Once I did this, I slightly opened the shutters to let light in. ‘Today’s gonna be the same’ I thought to myself, now walking over to my closet to get my uniform. Even with the window open it was hard to see. The lights in my room hadn’t worked in months so there was no point trying. I soon felt the cold metal of the closet door, opening it and retrieving my uniform. I held the fabric gently between my fingers for about eight seconds before putting it down on my bed so I could undress. I made sure to change as quickly as possible. Even though outside was filled with fog; I didn't want to take any chances of people seeing me dressing, in spite of the fact I was no longer standing near the window. 

Once I was changed I gently opened my bedroom door, it was unable to resist creaking quietly. Silently, I began to head downstairs, praying I didn’t wake either of my parents. Trailing my hand against the cracked paint on the stairway wall as I descended. A few years back I found if I got ready for school before either of my parents woke up, then I wouldn’t have to deal with all the screaming. This often meant I didn’t have time for breakfast, not that I actually had breakfast when they were awake anyway. Breakfast really isn’t that important of a meal anyway. 

On every school morning I had the same routine, wake up, get dressed, brush my teeth then out the door so I could make the train. Following the routine I headed towards the downstairs bathroom, quietly opening the door and turning on the lights. For a few seconds the sudden light blue shine burned my eyes, but I soon got over it. I quickly walked over to the sink. Staring at the blood stained, cracked bathroom mirror which showed my bruised, pale complexion. I went over to grab my toothbrush, running it under the water and beginning to brush my teeth. The mint sensation of the toothpaste helping to wake my up slightly. As I did this I stared at my face some more. Using my free hand I fiddled with a piece of my purple tinted hair. ‘Its getting long, I should probably cut it soon.’ I told myself, still fiddling with the messy lock. Soon, I spat out the foaming bubbles in my mouth and let it run down the sink. 

Right after that I turned off the flickering bathroom light and headed towards the front door, not bothering to even close the bathroom door. When I reached it I stared at my bag. Sighing, I pulled my phone out of it before throwing it over my shoulder. Last night I didn’t get a chance to even take it out of my bag before I had to run to my room and hide. It had a few cracks and a particular bear keychain, but other then that it was your standard phone. I quietly opened my front door, stepping outside before shutting it again. The rain had stopped by now but it was as foggy as ever.

Now I just had the trip to the station, which was a short walk.

As I walked I looked through what I missed. No messages, as usual. Someone uploaded their review of the newest episode of Danganronpa, which I hadn’t been able to watch since I left my phone in my bag. Other then that just some conversations on discord I missed. I decided to read through them as I walked.

Rededwatcher: I can’t wait for this season to be a game. Cuz like, I like watching the show and stuff but it started off as a game, and I liked playing through the mystery element and figuring stuff out myself.

GKopter: same

Rededwatcher: So No spoilers guys, I’m waiting for the season to finish so the game can come out so I can play it, keep the theories and deaths in the other channel.

I snickered, I mean it’d be a while before this season ended, and even longer to make a game. How would she be able to avoid spoilers. I decided to mess around a little.

PurpleShota: Hey Red

Classic4W: lol

I sighed, seeing the name that popped up as I typed.

PurpleShota: Ok who changed my nickname, this is the fifth time.

Rededwatcher: third* And me.

PurpleShota: Well you know who the third death is.

Rededwatcher: I swear to all that’s holy.

PurpleShota: Saitou

Classic4W: Oh damn

Rededwatcher: I’m murdering you

PurpleShota: Be my guest.

I smiled, closing the app as I reached the station. It was as full as you’d think it’d be. Students all around, some in the same uniforms, some in different. Adults on busy phone calls, and some people just relaxing.

As if the world revolved around me (Which I can guarantee does not) My train arrived. Smiling I headed through the sliding doors, the train being packed caused me stand among the crowd of people. I looked at my phone again, seeing angry notifications litter my screen. I sighed, reopening the app.

Classic4W: If you don’t wanna be spoiled don’t look at the channel called ‘New episodes’, Just stay in the games channel.

Rededwatcher: Yeah but you guys don’t talk there often, and I get lonely >n<

PurpleShota: Then talk to your real friends, this is just a small server that exists for being nerds about Danganronpa. 

Rededwatcher: Yeah but none of my real friends like Danganronpa and it’s like, my favourite thing.

I sighed once more, it’s true. Its almost impossible to find danganronpa fans anywhere in real excluding conventions. Even though it had a large fandom, it felt like it was so small.

PurpleShota: Then expect spoilers my dude. 

Rededwatcher: FIiNE, I won’t murder you then, but I’m not fixing ur nickname.

I closed the app, putting my phone back in my bag as I stared around the train. Thankfully no one from my school was in this car so, I didn’t have to deal with any down talk. This gave me the whole train ride to be alone with my thoughts. My lips slowly curling into a smile as my head began to enter the clouds. A place where no focus, no worries, nothing but yourself was needed.  
Unfortunately, Fate is a cruel mistress with other plans. 

At the next stop, a group of boys, none wearing my uniform, entered the car, pushing me out of the way so they could stand where I once was. I don’t blame them, they probably didn’t even notice me. However, the person I bumped into when I was pushed clearly did notice me. There were pros and cons to this situation, Pros? I didn’t hit the ground and get even more hurt then I usually am, cons? I just bumped into a person and now I felt horrible.

I couldn’t see the look on the persons face, it was covered by a navy cap and staring down at a phone in his hands. I could only assume it was a look of pure and utter disgust. From what I could see, I could tell this person was male, and a student. While looking at my feet I mumbled, “I-I’m so sorry.” Shame drenching my voice. As I looked back up I saw that they were now staring me all over, golden eyes plagued with intrigue, no… looking slightly shocked? Maybe he didn’t even notice me bump him? Oh dear, was I apologising for no reason like a weirdo.

After what felt like hours of him staring he mumbled, “It’s whatever..” Before looking back down at his phone. I let out a sigh of relief before turning to not face him. The group of boys were still standing where I previously was so I had no choice but to stand next to the boy I had bumped into. It felt awkward for me, from his expression I felt as if he didn’t care. I felt frozen, unable to move, speak or even breathe. As if one single wrong move would cause social suicide for myself.

Eventually, I heard a voice speak the name of my stop. I was unable to get past the navy boy so I mumbled, “A-ah.. this is where I get off.. is there any chance I could squeeze by..?” I screamed inside my head. ‘Damnit Kokichi, can’t you even speak right? Did that even make sense, God you’re so-‘ Before I was cut off by the boy saying a simple, “Same.” And then walking out of the doors.. I stood still for a few moments processing what had happened, before quickly running to get out of the train before the doors shut.

Breathing heavily I looked around, the boy nowhere in sight. I felt like passing out, all the stress of that awkward ride now gone. I quickly grabbed my phone from my bag to check the time.. “Still got over twenty minutes..” I mumbled, now reopening discord and talking to my only friends.

PurpleShota: I had the most awkward encounter- Red shoot me now pls

Rededwatcher: No ha, karma for spoiling me.

Rededwatcher: What happened.

PurpleShota: I accidentally bumped into someone on the train, I apologised for it and they just stared at me, then said whatever.

PurpleShota: Then since there was no space on the train I had to stand next to them the whole ride

Classic4W: omG

PurpleShota: And I said ‘Can I get by’ when it reached my stop, and he ended getting off too, and I stood still for a bit before practically diving out the doors.

Rededwatcher: iM WhEEZINg

Rededwatcher: Imagining you talking to anyone is hilarious, cuz y-y-y-ou cant st-stutter when you type.

PurpleShota: Y’see this is why I don’t go in the voice chats, cuz of your stupid stuttering jokes.

Putting my phone away once more, I shivered at the feeling of the crisp air. As I walked I could hear chatter among students heading the same way as me, most in the same uniform as mine. Most of it was the same as always.. ‘So your dating him?’ ‘Yeah.’ ‘But he cheated on you..’ ‘Yeah..?’ ‘I’m just saying, you should have a guy who would never do that, a guy who’s willing to protect you from anything!’

Once I heard this, I got a shiver down my spine, and soon felt a strong hand pull me up by my collar.  
“Like, look at this! You almost touched it, it could’ve given you some incurable disease!” This caused a chuckle around the nearby students. I didn’t know any of them, but they all knew me. How long have I had this label.. Maybe since I was seven… eight years old? It didn’t matter how long, it was still here.

‘Kokichi Ouma, The rat, the victim, the crybaby, the liar,’ The list goes on. 

Soon the guy dropped me, probably bruising my legs. “Ew I can’t believe I touched a rat.. anyone got any hand sanitiser?” He said, laughing as he walked off. I stood up, sighing. ‘Could’ve been so much worse.’ I told myself, dusting off my knees and continuing to walk. The closer I got, the more students seemed to appear. 

Eventually I reached the gates of my ‘beloved’ high school, the place infested with students. Most of my peers around me had similar reactions to my presence, sneer, snicker or completely ignore me all together. It was oddly calming though, at least when there were extremely large groups around me, nothing too bad could happen. As I entered the school and headed towards my locker, that feeling of safety vanished. 

On my locker, it read the same usual messages, such as ‘rat, freak, weakling’ but a few new ones.. ‘Nerd,’ which was classic but not often used with him.. ‘Wimp.’ One that was quite common, and ‘Gon Die 4lone’ Whoever wrote this was trying to be cool but failing.. who writes alone with a four..?  
I quietly took a photo of the locker before opening it, to be greeted with a bunch of dead cockroaches inside. This caused me to jump back and shriek, bad move Ouma, bad move.

This caused a pair of boys to come over laughing.. “Okabe? Did you see that, We actually scared the lil thing, he screamed like a girl.” Said the taller more masculine male, the other male with him was much smaller, only slightly bigger then me.. Whenever I saw students like this I was reminded it wasn’t how I look that had me treated like this. The shorter male snickered “Konako you’re a genius, and look at him! Not even fighting back.” 

I knew these two very well, common bullies of mine at school, this is not including when they find me outside of school, with their friends who go to other schools. Mikakotai Konako and Kansuke Okabe, Just two normal jerks with no serious notable personality traits, besides their lust for villainy.  
Konako being the taller one, the brawn, but still being quite intelligent. Looking like a rebellious delinquent with his hair a very dyed blonde and his roots visible. Okabe was a mystery, the boy was much smaller and acted more like a sidekick to Konako, mostly sticking around to boost his ego, reasons why are still unknown..

I’m getting too in depth with side characters aren’t I? Not my fault when you practice writing about your tormentors whenever you get a split-second of a chance. Speaking of writing, I pulled a black notebook from the locker and threw the cockroaches off it, Konako and Okabe laughing and wandering off. They clearly didn’t look inside, which was better for both them and me. I quickly put it back inside the locker and collected the books needed for my first class.. letting a gentle sigh escape my lips.

“Today’s just one of those days..” I mumbled, beginning to walk off. \

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gee, I hope that was good enough, I actually made fanart for the scene of Ouma staring at the mirror.. Ill link it here! I hope you all like this chapter! Knowing myself ill have a confusing post schedule. Apologies for that, I hope you liked that though!! I worked quite hard and think it truly paid off!
> 
> https://imgur.com/a/aGw78ME


	2. What else is there?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ITS BEEN A WHILE  
I got too nervous to upload the second chapter so I just, didnt..
> 
> And then just now i copy and pasted it from my word doc and uploaded it without a second thought..  
please be honest with any critique.

I opened my eyes to be greeted with a blur.

Wherever I was, it was dark, Not pitch black but.. Dark. After about a minute or two I regained my vision and looked at my surroundings. I understood now, I was around the back of the school building. I should’ve known, I’ve felt the cold concrete of these walls a million times before. I put a hand to my cheek and winced, I felt the sensation of dried blood which stained my cheek. “God damnit, not again.” I mumbled, spitting on my hand and using my saliva to rub the blood off my face. 

I saw my dirty bag only a few metres away from me, and painfully stood up to go retrieve it. Weakly limping over to it, I opened it to check if the contents were damaged, thankfully nothing was. I pulled my phone out from one of the pockets to check the time. ‘Last period started 20 minutes ago.’ I thought, looking at the time. “I should probably start heading to the train station. No point heading to class for like, 10 minutes.” I told myself. Slowly, I began to walk around the outside of the school towards the train station.

I silently stared at the school walls as I walked, trying to distract myself from the soft pain which rang throughout my head. I opened my discord to try and distract myself further but no dice, it was empty. No new messages, no one online, nothing, zit, nada. I sighed, deciding to look through fanart instead as a distraction. Some was really impressive, some was completely horrible and some was just decent. I quietly listened to the rhythm of my feet walking as I scrolled. It was relaxing. I enjoyed the feeling of being able to walk without anyone’s judgement.

The concept of time must’ve slipped away from me during my stroll to the station, because before I even realised it I had arrived. I glanced down at my phone, “Still got fifteen minutes before my train..” I mumbled to myself. I looked around, the grey station was emptier then usual. It was most likely because school had only ended once I arrived. This meant there was still a time period before students around arrived. There were a few people here though. There was an old man with greying hair on what I can only assume was a business call, a young, attractive woman wearing less then appropriate clothing, and a familiar looking boy sitting, staring at his phone.

I was extremely exhausted from what had happened to me only a little earlier, so instinctively I went to sit down. I made sure to be at least three seats away from the boy, not wanting to seem weird by sitting close. Soon I pulled my phone out again and returned to looking at fanart. The experience was calming, not having to focus my mind on anything. Using my free hand I fiddled with my keychain. The feeling of the smooth plastic relaxing me even further. I continued to do this until I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder, making me flinch.

I turned to my left, to see what had just touched me. Only to have locked eyes with the boy who was previously sitting three seats away from me. He had moved to be in the seat right next to me, and was leaning in too close for comfort. I could only just see his eyes, due to the fact I’m a lot shorter then him and he wore a navy cap. His golden eyes trailed all over me, showing a bit of surprise when he looked at certain parts of my face. “U-um..” Was all I could mutter before he was snapped out of his trance. Almost instantaneously he leaned backwards and turned to face the other way. “Sorry.“ He mumbled, hand on his mouth.

“I-it’s.. it’s fine really..” I responded, turning my head to face in front of me. For a short while, we sat in an awkward silence. Until finally, the boy beside me muttered “I like your keychain.” Which caused me to now face him. I tilted my head slightly, “Y-You know what it’s from?” I asked, intrigued. This caused him to turn and face me, making us lock eyes once more. “Yeah, that’s monokuma’s left eye! It’s pretty iconic in the series.” That sentence made my entire face practically glow in delight. “One would say it’s the most iconic besides the black and white pattern!” I said with more enthusiasm then I usually would, not even slightly stuttering.

This seemed to have made his face light up in response. “What’s you’re favourite season?” He said, a large smile coating his face. He seemed to be about three times more excited then I, but I didn’t mind. “It’s gotta be like..” I rested my non injured cheek on my hand as I thought, “I’d say it’s a tie between 29 and 32! They both had compelling storyline’s and amazingly written characters, not only that, the murders and executions fit perfectly!” I answered, smiling for the first time in what felt like years. But my smile was nothing compared to the large innocent grin on the boy in front of me.

“You’re so right!” he said, voice full of glee. “Those seasons were pretty amazing in my opinion too! Although the original will always hold a special place in my heart.” He explained, pulling his cap down slightly to cover his excited face. This made me giggle slightly, seeing someone get so embarrassed about a passion of theirs. Almost right after I finished giggling, he stuck his hand out, “I-I’m Saihara Shuichi.” He said, trying to keep it cool but failing miserably. I shook his hand, “Ouma Kokichi.” I said softly, before letting go and smiling once more at him. “So, Now I gotta know, who’s YOUR favourite character?” I asked, which once again made his face brighten as he began to ramble on about Kyoko Kirigiri from the original series. 

Our conversation seemed to go on for hours, as we rambled on and on about Danganronpa, not noticing the station slowly fill with others, some of them sharing a uniform with me. A few times during our conversation I had to take pauses to try and ignore some of the staring, which must’ve confused Saihara. But it never killed off our talk. After a while I was soon so lost in our own words I forgot completely about the world around me, In a different way then before. Earlier I forgot about the world because I was focusing on nothing, It was empty. But now, I was full of joy as the world’s troubles melted away.

But soon, that joy was put on hold, as Saihara stood up, gently put his hand around my wrist, and pulled me towards the train which I didn’t even see arrived. I was so confused, where was he taking me? Once we were inside the train, I noticed it was quite packed, no seats and little standing room. Saihara was still holding my wrist gently, meaning I had to stand close to him. The doors of the train shut slowly and it began to move, I turned my head towards Saihara, face full of confusion, and he looked down at me with a smile. “Don’t worry, this is our line.” He said, smiling warmly at me. This only confused me further.

“O-Our line..?” I asked, looking up at his joyful expression. He nodded, “Yeah! I saw you on the train this morning. It’s the main reason I was able to notice you earlier and see your keychain.” He said in a happy tone. I looked at my hand as I tried to think about anyone who would’ve noticed me this morning. There was no specific incidents besides those guys who pushed me into that boy- that boy.. My eyes quickly shot up at the smiling Saihara, before the guilt set in. “I-I’m so sorry! How did I not realise instantly! I feel horrible, I should’ve apologised once I first saw you, I-“ I began to go into a practical fit of apologies. Unable to stop saying sorry.

That is, until Saihara easily shut me up by saying, “Hey, stop.” It was a simple sentence but it made me go completely silent. He seemed just as shocked as I when it worked. It caused us both to go quiet for a few moments, before Saihara chimed in. “That.. worked? Interesting..” He said, hand on his mouth as his hat covered his expression. “Wh-what’s interesting..?” I questioned, curious about what he meant. “Ah, don’t worry Ouma-kun, it’s nothing important.” He said, showing me another small smile. I was still extremely confused by what he meant, but I decided to take a good thing and leave it be.

“So, Ouma-Kun, what are your thoughts on the newest episode?” Saihara asked, changing the subject back to Danganronpa. “I haven’t been able to w-watch it yet.” I said, laughing awkwardly. “I-I was going to last night but I-“ I cut myself off to quickly think of a simple lie,”Was busy, but I am watching it tonight.” I said, trying my best to mimic one of his innocent smiles, but most likely failing and looking like garbage. Saihara seemed genuinely disappointed at this, “That’s too bad, You have no Idea how much I wanted to hear your thoughts on it..” He mumbled. “But now I have to wait until at least tomorrow morning..” He said, turning to face some random part of the train.

“Ah? T-tomorrow, wait you mean you enjoyed this conversation?” I asked, startled like never before. Not only did Saihara just say he enjoyed my thoughts, he wanted to hear more? And soon? This was a strange feeling for me, excitement? Most likely. Saihara looked down at me “Yeah! Of course, no one else I know enjoys talking about Danganronpa like you, and I wanna hear more.” He said, excited as usual. “Oh, I just thought of an idea.” He said, in a tone that made it sound like he practiced it in his head. “Ouma-Kun,” He really liked saying my name didn’t he?

“Why don’t we exchange numbers? Right now, that way the second you watch the episode you can tell me about it!” What- Wait no, I had to process this. A complete stranger, who I rudely bumped into this morning, who has only known me for probably an hour and only shares one known interest with me, wants my number? He doesn’t know me, I don’t know him! He could be a serial killer, I could be one too? Yet he trusts me because I like Danganronpa? What kind of insane man is this! It would be stupid for me to say yes.

But on the contrary, the innocent smile he had when simply talking about characters being brutally executed was one that I had a hard time denying. Besides, even if he is a serial killer, what am I doing with my life anyway?

“Ok.” I said, pulling my phone out and handing it to Saihara so he could put his number in and it mine in his phone. He seemed to be noting the crack on the screen, but passing it off. When he handed me back my phone, his whole face was beaming with joy. It was if he had never known anyone half as interesting as me. Which was unbelievable since, I’m as low as it possibly gets. I was able to mask my excitement with nothing but a weak smile. Saihara kept pulling his hat down to shield his expression. “Sorry.” He said, “I’m just, I don’t..” He took a deep breath. “Never mind.” 

That was disappointing, I really wanted to hear what he was about to say. Even if he did say it, the sound of my stop being called out from the speakers would’ve interrupted him. “Ah, That’s me.” I said, looking towards the opening doors. “I’ll see you later Saihara-Kun!” I said, pulling another weak smile and scurrying off the train. I watched as he waved to me when the doors closed, and the train blitzed away. Once it was gone my smile grew, after all I didn’t have anyone to mask it from.

I began to head towards my house, skip in my step. That was weird, I’ve never felt like this before. Maybe once or twice when I was quite young, too far back to remember. Was this the feeling of making a friend? Not a friend online in a chat, but a real friend you can speak to face to face? Someone who shares interests with you and doesn’t think you’re scum? I liked it. I liked the feeling. I liked it a lot. It was nice.

I felt as if the world’s troubles melted away once more, forgetting all of my problems as I opened my front door.

Until I was, quite literally, thrown back into harsh reality.


	3. Dark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi so uh
> 
> I decided i want to have each chapters shorter and stuff.  
I don’t HAVE a upload schedule i just do it when i feel like it.
> 
> And apologies if the quality seems to drop.
> 
> I just wanna keep writing this but usually lack motivation so it’ll just be MY best, not me pushing myself to write more words or keep rewriting to improve it. Just what i feel.
> 
> Apologies for anyone with high standards

I felt my face hit the ground, hearing a voice yell at me right after. Who was it this time, my mother or my father? It’s best if I just head upstairs and pretend it didn’t happen. I got up slowly and went to my room, instantly face planting on my bed. Bad decision on my part, since I just hit the ground before, so my face wasn’t feeling very good. I rolled onto my back instead, getting my phone out. ‘I told Saihara I would watch the episode, so I should do it now.’ I told myself, now searching for the newest episode online. Once I found it I pressed play and let myself be engulfed by the world of this series.. 

Soon enough, the episode was over. It was a good one, the trial for the third murder, Saitou and this guy Takoyami to be exact. The killer was some guy who’s reason was ‘he wanted them to be together forever, even in death.’ That’s messed up, imagining killing somebody just because you liked them, and killing some other guy since he liked her. Disgusting, but a good trial and an ok execution to say the least. Why were people crying over this weirdo though, it’s stupid.

Now that I was done watching, I opened my messages.. would it be weird to text Saihara now? I mean he did want to hear my thoughts as soon as possible, but I didn’t wanna seem too pushy or annoying. Besides I just met the guy, so maybe texting him now is a bad idea. I let out a groan of annoyance, why couldn’t I just do it like a normal person. Maybe I should do something else first and then text him? Yeah! Yeah that’s a good idea.

I looked over to my school bag, I have homework to do anyway. I slid off the bed and went over to my bag, opening it, taking out my homework and a pen and starting to work. 

I did it again.

I blacked out halfway through my homework and now I’m here.

In an alley, late at night, covered in blood.

But it’s not mine.

I stare down at the body before me, a middle aged man, maybe late 30’s, 40’s ish…. Dark brown hair, his eyes closed so I can’t tell the colour. He’s laying on his side, blood trickling onto the ground from a wound in his chest, scratch that, multiple wounds. I stand still, holding a blade covered in blood the exact same as the man’s who lay before me. I knew by now that what I did was real, although the memories of me doing it weren’t there.

I fall to my knees, tears pooling in my eyes, this was not the first time and wouldn’t be the last.. This is why I deserve all the cruel things that happen to me, why I deserve all the pain and suffering. I deserve it since I do things like this, And I can’t stop. So many times I have committed such horrible sins to innocent people, and I hate myself for it. I always seem to hope that maybe one day I’ll stop, and be able to live a normal life. But I know that this is already my fate, to be atrocious and unforgivable.

I stood back up, leaving the alley. No one was around, and I could tell what street I was on. So I simply began to head my way back home, burying my guilt inside with each step I took.

I look down to my phone, checking the time… but getting distracted by 3 notifications. They were all texts, from Saihara, asking me if I had watched the newest episode yet. I smiled, opening the app and beginning to text my thoughts and opinions on it. 

A way to distract myself at least..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again sorry for the lack of quality and how short it was, but writing like this just makes it easier for me.
> 
> This story probably wont end up good but I wanna at least finish it.


End file.
